Friday, February 7, 2014

Sochi #Olympics Opening Ceremonies

I've actually feel like a terrible writer/blogger because I only ever feel like writing about television. I last wrote about the restaurant my wife and I went to for her birthday. The writing was ok, but it still felt kind of generic to me. I like to write with passion about a subject. I like to write as though I might piss someone off. Then I remembered, #justwrite. There's no better way to be arrogant, and piss people off, than to talk about the #Olympics as an American.. Tonight was the opening ceremonies in #Sochi, Russia.

Honestly, I think the winter #Olympics are far more boring than the summer. I'd much rather watch #basketball or #gymnastics or #swimming. My wife says swimming is exciting because #RyanLochte is so hot. I think winning is hot, so I like swimming, basketball and I like women's gymnastics. #McKaylaMaroney doesn't care about much else, and I agree.

All I care about in this Olympic session, is hockey, and bobsleds. The contending hockey teams are dominated by #ChicagoBlackHawks members and it is going to be so fun to watch our boys skate against each other. Just please don't play very hard. No hard checks on the glass. Please. Shake hands, call it a good game, and come back home to #SweetHomeChicago and bring us another #StanleyCup.
As for the opening ceremonies, I was pretty impressed. The girl described as a [fearless gymnast], blew my expectations away. She reminded me of #ET passing the moon.

"You want me to do what? Soar over the stadium, twice? Three times??!!

I'll pass. I'm black. I just know I'd be the first casualty of the 2014 Olympics. Hash tag, the black guy dies first.

I wish I could have been in charge of sending the #American contingency regardless of Olympic eligibility. I'd have had #SamJackson lead #ToddLodwick out carrying the US flag in a flaming chariot, ala, #TheHungerGames.

I also have to say that I'm rooting for #Jamaica in #bobsleigh. First, I like warm weather sports. Second, I love #tv and #movies. Third and last, how could anyone not root for the #JamaicanBobsledTeam?

Have you ever wondered whether you'd like ballet or opera. My wife clarified for me. I would enjoy Russian ballet far more than Russian opera. I agreed. During the ballet I'd figure out what the hell was going on. During the opera, I'd just sit there and try and learn the Russian language. It'd be miserable for both of us, and anyone sitting near us.

I have one last thought before you lose interest. #Chicago lost the bid for the 2016 Olympics. #Rio got it, but I bet neither city would have made this big of a mistake.

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