Friday, January 30, 2015

The Interview - Part I

Truth be told, I never cared about watching #TheInterview. If KimJongblahblahblah had any sense, he would have ignored it, and it would have just been some other Franco movie. Since he didn't, Americans everywhere want to know what the big deal is. I don't personally like to make political stances, but this movie insists I do so. This is only the first part of my review. I'm too tired to watch the whole damn thing tonight.

The following are my journal entries, and thoughts, about the first 30 minutes of the movie. Please don't hate me, North Korea, James Franco, or #TMZ.

The following is written in the order I wrote it down.

1. I hate James Franco. His second visit was the only #fallontonight I skipped.
2. I get it. Skylark Tonight is TMZ.
3.Eminem is gay? Ok. Yea. Ok.
4. The Lord of the Rings references were all screwed up.
5. Rob Lowe secretly bald is crazy-talk. He's a very handsome man. I worry about my wife liking him.
6. James Franco sounds like he is channeling either Bill or Ted.
7. "They hate us, cuz they ain't us. (Anus) (Ain't us) (Anus) (Ain't us)
8. That's the strongest ecstasy I've done in my life.
9. I need to make a list of my most favorite, and least favorite actors and actresses.
10. The top five best things about this movie so far, are Seth Rogen, and Lizzy Caplan.
11. If our country's safety is ever left to James Franco, and/or Seth Rogen, we're all screwed.

This was all just Part I.

Next, I'm hoping to write about how great the rest of the movie was.

To be honest, my hopes aren't high.





Sunday, January 25, 2015

Talking to Myself/ Another Top 5 TV

The following is a conversation I just had with myself.

-I haven't watch a western movie in a while. I should do that, and then blog about it.
-This sounds familiar. Maybe I should look at my previous blog posts.
-Oh, that's right. I wrote not one, but two, blog posts about my favorite westerns and what makes a great western.
-You're an idiot.
-Yes, I know.
-So write about something else.
-Like what?
-I don't know. You like making lists, so make a list.
-About what?
-How about Batman? Make a list of your favorite scenes from a Batman movie.
-Nah, that sounds boring to write, and even more boring to read.
-Fine. What about your current favorite shows?
-I guess. That wouldn't be too boring. But now I have to rank my current favorite shows.
-Your life is so hard. Quit whining, and #justwrite
-OK. Thanks, self.

So, there. I'm a complete lunatic. I talk to myself, and even worse, I answer myself. I'm sure they have medications for my condition, but my favorite medication is beer. I'll stick with that.

The following is a list of my top shows, that I watch, day-to-day.

Smallville
I have all 10 seasons on DVD, and it's one of only two shows that I own the complete series. (The other is Angel, but that's another blog post.) My wife completed my set by getting me the 4th season, and decided that she'd like to watch it from start to finish. It's been fun rewatching it with her, but... I only gave her one instruction. Don't watch the season six episode, 'Justice', without me. It's my favorite ep of the entire series. She watched it without me.

Justified
If you read my nonsense, you already know, I love westerns, and I have a cap-gun. Season five of Justified just became available on Amazon Prime Instant Video, and I have turned into a total cowboy. Raylan Givens is the fastest gun in the dirty south, and he's got a bad attitude that I love.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ifXhlg4N8e0
Also, let me not forget to recommend my new friends, http://www.99centnetwork.com/web99/index.html, and on twitter, @99CentNet @moviemusicnet

The Tonight Show
Jimmy Fallon and The Roots celebrated their 200th episode this past week. I have seen every episode since it premiered , except for the second time James Franco was the lead guest. I can't explain why, but I find Franco incredibly annoying. But not a day goes by, where I finish my day with Jimmy, or start my day with Jimmy and my son.

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
There is never a time where Star Trek of some sort is not in my Netflix, Hulu, or Amazon queue. Currently it's DS9, but in the near future, I foresee it being Voyager. If it's not Star Trek, it'll be Stargate. Me and SciFi have an agreement. It is always available on my tv.

Blue Bloods
You can ask my wife. I love cop shows. My problem is, my cop shows can be pretty scary. My wife won't watch SVU or Criminal Minds, because it's always about women and children being hurt. Now, as a father, I also can't watch those shows, and the nightly news, and then go to bed without having bad dreams. But Blue Bloods is great. Because it's about family, and legal procedure, I can, and do watch it all the time on Netflix. Also, how can you not love a show starring someone from New Kids on the Block.

So, there ya go. That's what a TVJunkie, and lunatic, watch everyday. Seeya next week.

-J


Sunday, January 18, 2015

"Friends" - The One With Frank Jr.

Two blog posts, in two days??!! Crazy.

To break up the monotony of all the sci-fi and action I prefer to watch, the wife and I like to watch older comedies on #Netflix. She grew up without a TV, which I find insane. So in the almost 5 years we've been married, and two more when we were dating, I've tried to educate her on all the great shows she's missed.

I don't remember the order, but so far I've made her watch #TheCosbyShow, #Cheers, #Frasier, #Coach, #FamilyTies, #21JumpStreet, #Roseanne, and several other shows that escape my memory at the moment. (I can't wait for #GrowingPains to get on #Netflix.) I think it was a pretty good foundation.

Currently, we've been watching #Smallville, #Scrubs, and #Friends. I've had a hard time not saying what happens to every character in Smallville. I own the entire DVD set. I can only kind of care about Scrubs. It was a show I watched because my old roommate/friend/groomsman was a fan. 'Friends' is a show I watched in passing on my way to adulthood, but is one of the only shows Kate watched religiously in her teen years.

So, 'Friends' has been fun. Some episodes I can almost quote every line of dialogue. Some I'm pretty sure I've never seen at all. Last night we watched "The One With Frank Jr." It was about Phoebe meeting her brother for the second time, and the friends making lists of which celebrities they would/could sleep with. Almost 20 years ago I made that list, but I can't remember who was on it. So, I decided to make the list  again, publish it on my blog, and make my wife do the same.

The following is mine and my wife's list of celebrities we could sleep with sans repercussions. We both reserve the right to change our minds, and change our lists. The celebrities are not listed in any particular order.

Katie's Five
1. Justin Timberlake (He's JT, duh)
2. Jonathan Rhys Meyers (The Tudors)
3. Mos Def (rapper)
4. Chris O'Donnell (NCIS: Los Angeles)
5. Bradley Cooper (People  Magazine 2011 'Sexiest Man Alive')

That's a pretty good lady's list. 4 out of the 5 are on my list of 'Dudes I'd Like to Hang out With'. Only Jonathan Rhys Meyers isn't on the list. I wouldn't know who he was if I hadn't married Kate, and watched #TheTudors with her.

Jason's Five
1. Anna Kendrick (Pitch Perfect)
2.Teri Hatcher (Lois and Clark, Desperate Housewives)
3.Emma Stone (A bunch of stuff)
4. Autumn Reeser (The O.C.)
5. Jennifer Love Hewitt (Party of Five, currently Criminal Minds)

I think both of our lists are a pretty good representation of us being in our 30s. Jonathan on Kate's list got her attention 8 years ago. I fell in love with Teri Hatcher over 20 years ago in #Lois&Clark. Coincidentally, she also now does voice acting for my son's new favorite show #JakeAndTheNeverlandPirates .

Sorry this post wasn't as long as yesterday's. At least today's has fewer typos. Read it, critique it, and send me your thoughts. I enjoy getting feedback from my 4 or 5 followers.

Thanks for reading, and I'll talk to you soon.

-JJ

Al Sharpton and The First Annual TV Junkie Awards

Holy crap, it's been over a month since the last time I posted. I swear, I haven't been totally neglectful. I scribble notes in my journals almost every day. My problem is that I like to get so organized before I write, that by the time I'm organized, I just want to lay down for the night. I gotta remind myself to #justwrite. So, that's what I'm going to do.

Al Sharpton is back in the news, pissed off, about black representation in the Oscar nominations.

"The movie industry is like the Rocky Mountains. The higher you get, the whiter it gets. I have called an emergency meeting early next week in Hollywood with the task force to discuss possible action around the Academy Awards." - Al Sharpton

Gimme a fuckin' break. I realize that it's been 16 years since Oscar nominations have been without a black nominee for best actor or actress. But to me, it says this wasn't a great year for black actors. It doesn't say that anyone of any race, religion, or creed was intentionally ignored. Just that this year, the best performers happened to have been white. When thinking of black performers, only #DavidOyelowo (from #Selma, nominated for best picture) pops to mind as someone who probably deserved consideration. And, I haven't seen the movie, so I can't even suggest to have an expert opinion.

My next concern, is Reverend Sharpton "discussing possible action" with his Diversity Task Force.Get a grip, people. If you are bothered by classism, or racism, or any other ism, attack it. Do something, but start with issues that matter. Poverty. Racial violence. Unemployment. Genocide. Homelessness. There are so many issues, it seems idiotic to address flesh wounds with a bandaid. Let's go after the hearts of the problems.

And, what 'action' could Sharpton possibly be discussing? Boycotts of the Academy Awards? Union protests? Actors' refusing roles? It seems to me, everyone's energy, time, and money could be better spent serving food in a kitchen, or handing out Bibles on a street corner. It's silly, detrimental, divisive, and then silly again. We've all got to do better.

With all of this foolishness in mind, I've decided to make my own awards. #TVJunkieAwards is what I've decided to call them. My criteria is based solely on shows that I have watched, or currently watch. Also keep in mind, these are my shows. If I don't watch it, I don't rank it. I do what I want, when I want.  I'll list other nominees for some of my lists. Other lists, will just reveal my #1s.

Best Drama
I have to say #Scandal. The show blows my mind every time I watch a new episode.The new show #Empire, #TheGoodWife, #PersonOfInterest, and #Elementary were all runner-ups.

Best Comedy
Brooklyn Nine-Nine #B99 I love #LastManStanding, #Blackish, #NewGirl, and #TheBigBangTheory, but B99 is the funniest. If Mike Baxter were a real person, and needed me to go out and kick some ass, I'd be there. Unless it was someone way bigger than me. #PickYourBattles

Best Actor in a Dramatic Series
Johnny Lee Miller - #Elementary is a great crime serial, and JLM makes for an amazing #SherlockHolmes. You can't even tell, most of the time, that his accent is fake as hell.

Best Actress in a Dramatic Series
Taraji P. Henson is absolutely insane as the "gangsta bitch" in the new Fox drama #Empire. She was also pretty amazing in #PersonOfInterest, as an honest cop, before the producers killed her off (assholes). She easily beat out #StanaKatic (Castle), #MariskaHargitay (SVU), and #KerryWashington (Scandal).

Best Actress in a Comedic Series
#ZooeyDeschanel is a total scene stealer. The beginning of season 4 of #NewGirl was total crap, but after a bit of a warm-up, it's back to being hilarious. I'm sure it has nothing to do with adding black cast members to get a ratings bump. My last name isn't Sharpton, so that would never occur to me.

Best Actor in a Comedic Series
#AndySamberg dominates the sitcom universe. There has never been an episode of #B99 where he wasn't hilarious.

Best Reality Show
Utopia- I hate most reality shows, but #AmericanIdol and all #ChefGordonRamsay are pretty addicting. My personal favorite got cancelled before we found out how the pioneers dealt with money, survival, and interpersonal relationships. My Utopia wouldn't have as many crazy people, but it was as fun as it could be in such a short amount of real time.

Best Childrens' Programming
My son is just barely past one year old. So far I haven't really had to watch much children programming. Thus, his 5 minute attention span has only yielded a few favorites. He loves #CuriousGeorge, and #WinnieThePooh, but his new, current favorite, is #DoraTheExplorer. Dora is browned skin, and speaks Spanish, so you know that's alright with me. My only concern is that my parents got him a piece of baby furniture featuring #JakeThePirate, and I have no idea who the hell that character is.

Best New Comedy
I really like #AboutABoy, #Selfie, and #Blackish. About a boy is a spinoff of the #NickHornby novel of the same name. It's about a single, unemployed musician, that befriends his nerdy next-door-neighbor-kid. It's cute, but entirely forgettable. Selfie, already cancelled, is a modern take on #MyFairLady. I liked it, but I'm not sure if it was because the show was good, or if it was because it starred #KarenGillan (Doctor Who) and #JohnCho (Star Trek). Blackish is hoping to be the new #CosbyShow about an affluent black family worried about how to teach their kids about being minorities. I was worried about Blackish as a premise, and what might be the mainstream reaction, but it's hilarious, and I recommend it to everyone. Even white people.

Best New Drama
Gotham - I've always been a #DC comic guy, so #Gotham was an easy show to look forward to.At first, I worried they'd introduce too many villains at once. The first few episodes introduced Catwoman, The Riddler, The Penguin, Poison Ivy, and various gangsters.But, it has so far slowed down the character development, and allowed for more interesting storylines. Hopefully, they keep it up. It would be a shame to waste such great performances by #BenMcKenzie.

Finally, I have to throw the worsts of 2014 out there for you to hopefully trust me, and not watch.

Worst Drama
Mixology - Brutal. Just absolutely, awful. I tried to watch the first few episodes, hoping it'd get better. It got worse. Time machine research would be a more economical spending of money than trying to get this awful show out of the gutter. Take my word for it. It's not even worth viewing to see how bad it is.

Worst Comedy
Mom - Not funny. Not endearing. Not cute. Skip it at all costs. The show's only saving grace is that #AllisonJanney is in it, and I still love her from #TheWestWing.

Well, I guess that's enough for now. I've got more coming. My next post will be about something I saw rewatching #Friends on #Netflix. I dare you to guess. Until then,

"You've got a friend in me." - Toy Story

-JJ